I'm not hanging onto your every word,
I'm thriving on my self sufficiency.
I'm not listening to the things I've heard
About me and you.
People think there must be something to the way
I talk about you every chance I get,
But if I think about you night and day,
Doesn't mean I'm ready yet.
Maybe I'm knee-deep in denial,
Or maybe I'm just trying to move on.
Maybe I should just keep away awhile.
But if distance is right, I'd rather be wrong.
Because I love the way you're smiling at me,
When it's you I know it's true- I'm still in love with you.
And I love the way you're trying not to let me see
You're still in love with me too.

It astounds me how I can dedicate so much of my time and my self to both a person and a place and they both destroy me.

How I can give everything I have, and get nothing.

How something that is just a way to make a living can matter so much.

How someone who is consigned to the past can matter so much.

It amazes me that having everything I want but nothing I need can make me so unhappy.

That someone can be so different to what you thought they were.

That I am my own worst enemy.

That without my even knowing it, my world has become a place with limits, boundaries and restrictions.